Wednesday, May 31, 2006

new york city by the numbers

Halfway through my trip to New York, I realized that there is no way on Earth I'd be able to sum it up in one meager post. In order to sate myself and my hungry audience, I've decided to to do a quick number list and then move on with different posts throughout the coming week. I also left my camera in New York, so I can't show any pics until I get it back. Anyway here's my trip by the numbers:

0: The number of souvenirs I bought for myself.
0: Number of automobiles I touched (not counting buses)
1: Number of rollercoaster rides (The Cyclone)
1: Number of Broadway musicals I starred in
1: Number of words I spelled correctly at the 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee (jihad)
1: Number of words I spelled incorrectly at the 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee (zuuzuu)
2: Number of celebrities I saw unexpectedly
2.5: Number of hot dogs I ate.
3: Number of Broadway musicals I saw
4: Number of beautiful girls who accompanied me
4: Number of celebrities I was aware of who starred in Threepenny Opera
6: Number of subway trains I rode (1,2,3,E,N,Q)
8: Number of themed restaurants I went to (Chinese, Thai, Mexican, pizzaria, soul food, pub, bakery, British)
16: Amount in dollars I spent for an orange juice and french fries at Joe's Pub
20: Amount in dollars I spent for admission to a Nellie Mckay concert at Joe's Pub
24: Amount in dollars I spent to purchase a 7-day unlimited subway and bus metrocard
92: Number of pictures or videos taken with my camera
231: Amount in dollars I spent on Broadway musicals
587.03 Amount in dollars I spent on my debit card for the trip (including plane tickets)
???.?? Amount in cash I spent

That's it for now. Tune in soon for the following possible entries:

serendipity now!
broadway debut. D-E-B-U-T, debut.
whoa nellie! just kidding nellie, don't let up!
here comes the subway system!
new york city 2006 : a year in photographs (taken over a four-day period)
party at ground zero
low class depravity of the highest class

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

muted mutations

I realized something mildly disasterous a couple of weeks ago. I'll be in New York on Friday.

May 26th is a very important day for many reasons.

The third X-Men movie comes out on May 26th. Many people may be very surprised to learn that I really enjoy all things X-Men. Six years ago I actually dressed up as Magneto when I attended the screening. That was the week I met Rhett. I've mentioned this before, but the guy thought I was a total weirdo for dying a pair of Hanes briefs dark purple. X2 is the best comic book movie yet produced. I've been dying to find out what happens to Jean Grey. Many of you who saw the movie may have noticed an image of a fiery bird when Jean dies at the end. This, of course, is alluding to the famous Dark Phoenix saga from the comic books. For those of you silly enough to be unaware of the Dark Phoenix saga it goes something like this:

(**deep breath**)So this entity from outer space known as the Phoenix Force inhabits the body of Jean Grey and the entity transports herself with the X-Men to another galaxy where the Phoenix Force is the guardian of the M'Kraan crystal, a powerful object that has the power to destroy the universe and this crazy guy named D'Ken has seized control of the Galactic Shi'ar Empire and the crystal and plans to use it to conquer everything, but he's unaware that it will simply destroy everything so anyway the Phoenix and the X-Men thwart this guy, but not without Phoenix/Jean getting a taste of emotion through a mutant named Mastermind (which is actually the basis of Jason Stryker in X2) and the emotion the entity really enjoys is vengeance, so she/it goes on a sort of interplanetary killing spree in which billions of beings die and so after that Lilandra, the new empress of the Shi'ar Empire totally bags Professor X and demands that Phoenix/Jean be executed for restitution as well as precaution, but Xavier demands that the X-Men fight for her behalf and strangely the X-Men lose, partly because of their moral conflics over what Jean/Phoenix did, but before the execution can happen, Jean loses control again, but is able to commit suicide before she destroys everything. Years later the X-Men discover that the body Phoenix used was a clone and that the real Jean was in a cocoon the Atlantic Ocean (***gasp***).

Based on the previews I've seen, not much of that actually happens in the upcoming movie.

Oh well, I suppose I won't see it in New York. I'll have other things to do. Nobody tells me what happens though, got it?

May 26th. Big day for many reasons. I listed two.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

erasurenomics-itis

Tell me... if you bought tickets to a show that sold out in ten minutes, do you really think you'd have a very hard time selling those tickets? I work at a place that constantly heralds the joys of capitalism, yet I can't make the most obvious sale. I knew I was in trouble when people were at the venue trying to sell their front row tickets at cost. For some reason EVERYBODY wanted tickets two months ago and NOBODY wanted them two days ago.

Not too much to complain about, though. Besides Monica, whom I asked to go with me last week, I was forced to bring two more girls along. The aforementioned Kristi and Dre gladly took the opportunity. I missed the first song, because I was still outside getting Dre's ticket to her. I think it was something off Cowboy, so no big loss. Of course, cowboys are fitting. Several young men dressed as cowboys for the show. Andy dedicated a song to the "good-looking cowboys." I must also say that this is probaby the first country concert I've ever been, which is VERY weird considering Erasure is one of the foremost synthesiser British bands. On the Erasure videos which I own (which are also HILARIOUS by the way) Vince Clarke talks about how he'd rather program synthesisers rather than play guitar because he just has to push a button instead of perform and therefore never screw up. "Love To Hate You" was initially unrecognizable in its salsafied form, while "Sometimes"was done sort of bluegrassy. They did a slow version of "Oh L'amour" and an understandably slow version of "Piano Song," which is a new favorite of mine. I wasn't sure if they would play it. Even though it's acoustic originally anyway, they didn't actually bother to bring a piano. Vince and this other guy had acoustic guitars, one of the back up singers played a flute and one of those June Carter strumming thingios, they had a standard drummer, the bass was upright and the guy who would've been playing piano had one of those sit-down stringy strummy things. My acoustic vocabulary is pretty lacking. Anyway, they saved "Chains of Love" and "A Little Respect" for the very very end, much to the delight of a much-relieved Monica.

Anyway, probably the best part of the night was having three beautiful girls argue over which one of them was going to buy me dinner. Monica won, but I got rainchecks.

So this is probably worth another entry, but I already titled this entry accordingly, so I may as well mention it. I'm not very healthy, at least a few days ago I wasn't. Allergies, I think. I never had allergies before I moved into the super-cute house I live in now. I think maybe a seasonal moldy spore monster could be lurking behind the walls. It's very unfortunate, since it's such a home to me. I remember a few short years ago I realized that Provo didn't feel like home anymore. Sure, everybody leaves Provo, but it was still home, right? The feeling was quite disconcerting. Now instead of being spiritual rejected, I'm being physically rejected from my own house. The feeling is quite phlegmy.

In case you're wondering, I went to the doctor on Wednesday and he threw me a bunch of zyrtecs. They seem to be doing the job, but I was hoping to let my body overcome this itself. When I went to the selecthealth website to find a doctor there was an article right there on the front page about allergies. It said that 200 years ago there were probably like 50 people in the United States with allergies. Now there are 50 million. The article mentioned the "Hygiene Hypothesis," which is the idea that the reason there are so many more allergic reactions now is because we're too clean. Our bodies aren't exposed to the bad stuff enough to make them good. Well that's just great. All this progression and civilization only to de-evolve? Fabulous. What really bugs me is that at this point in my life, I think I may be at the lowest rung of the de-evolution ladder out of all humanity.

The robots will win soon.

When I went to NAB, I looked at an automation system that doesn't just run a radio station, but it controls several radio stations across the country from the same place. Have you ever read Neuromancer? Trippy. Anyway, wouldn't it be horrible to realize that you were actually employed by an automated being?

Thursday, May 11, 2006

selling!

Does anyone want Erasure tickets for Monday's Salt Lake show? I bought a bunch knowing the show would sell out in less than a half hour and therefore knowing that I'd make a sweet profit. I checked eBay yesterday and for some reason it's suddenly a weak market for Erasure tickets. MODified Music just sent me an email saying that there are a bunch of other people selling. I called MODified and discovered that with the music store helping to sell, they seem to be going. Hopefully they pull through for me too. In the meantime, if you want tickets, you got 'em. But don't tell me you want them without paying for them. That just tells me you don't want them.

Monday, May 08, 2006

do you know what day it is?

Finally! For those lost souls who weren't able to get their hands on the hot little West Capitol 2006 Calendar, today's your lucky day! I've finally managed to convert the whole thing into a simple Word document. Instructions on downloading, printing and assembling the calendar are right here. You have the option of just printing the whole thing out on individual papers or doing a specialty print and assembling the whole thing so that it folds just like a real calendar. I recommend the second option because it took me several hours to figure out.

Friday, May 05, 2006

cinco del reloj en cinco de mayo

Yesterday, when I walked out to my car to go home after work, i began inexplicably singing "Big Me" by Foo Fighters. When I turned on the car radio, guess what song was playing? How often is that song played on the radio? How often do I even sing it? It was one of those Truman Show type moments.

If only I had something more interesting to say right now.

Monday, May 01, 2006

mayday! mayday!

I don't know what else to do. Does anyone know where our Can't Hardly Wait, Say Anything, Wall Street and Mystery Men DVDs are? They're all missing. Right now the theory is that they've slowly been swiped during various parties we've had. What's the deal people?

Does anyone need anything in New York City? Turns out I just made plans to go there at the end of the month. My old school buddy Kristi talked me into it. We're going to visit our other friend, Sally. Sally and I have enjoyed a healthy flirtation for about four or five years, so it'll be fun entendres all over again. Kristi really wants to see Wicked and Sally wants to go to Coney Island. I really really want to see The Threepenny Opera, featuring Nellie McKay, my very favorite songstress. I'm expected to leave on the 25th and I get back on the 29th. Hopefully, I'll manage the whole thing with work. If not, I'll have to use my plane tickets later, so New York is inevitable.