Monday, April 02, 2007

i've only told six jokes so far

That last entry was written very poorly and I apologize. Now is about the time I automatically tell a joke. Today I discovered that I really have to think about not being in a humorous mood. I think it might be a defense mechanism or a stress reliever or something.

Getting on with things, I've already had a really hard time and have actually given in a few times. Here are the jokes I slipped up on (marvel at how stupid they are that I totally sold out my integrity so soon):

1. During our V.I.P. Media morning meeting my boss, Pete, said that our latest video project was shown at some kind of library fundraiser that raised $100,000. I responded with "So, what's our cut?" This was almost not a joke, since I kind of legitimately wanted to know how much the company makes during these things. I didn't get an answer, though, so I guess it was just a joke.

2. During the same meeting, Chad, a co-worker mentioned that when he was in school he took a sound class. For the final, the professor removed all the sound effects from the movie Silverado and the class took about a month to develop the sound effects and re-edit them into the movie. I said, "So you didn't just rent Silverado and put the same effects back in?"

3. We got new candy in the candy bowl at work. One of the candies is actually called "Mary Jane." I had to ask, "So do we just eat this? Does anyone have a lighter?"

4. I've been consistently coming into work at 9:15 am. Pete told me that we're meeting at Village Inn tomorrow at 8:30 am to award the winning bracket of the office March Madness contest. I said "There's an 8:30 am now?" Of course this is really an example of a totally different type of joke that I'm trying to overcome. It's pretty much a direct Simpsons quote.

5. Jarem was at my house with his girlfriend, Chantel, and he got on the phone with his mom to ask her if Chantel could come over for dinner on Wednesday. Suddenly, Mike and Rhett started yelling about coming along too until Jarem finally asked his mom if they could come too. After all the commotion died out I uttered, "I'm so very hungry." Same thing as joke five. That was a direct Futurama quote.

6. Chantel remarked that my customized Catan game just needed one adjustment to make an island of each resource. I told her, "I'll take it up with the committee," referring strictly to myself. It could be argued that the remark isn't a joke at all. It's also a longshot quote from Empire Strikes Back. Han said aloud to "Take it up with the committee," to which Leia yelled back, "I am not a committee!"

Also, since I made this list of six i was watching the big basketball game tonight and when the ball was passed to an exceptionally short player I instinctively yelled "dunk it!"

*sigh* See? these jokes aren't even that funny.

Okay, that's not a very good start, I admit it.

6 comments:

Charlotta-love said...

I laughed at your non-jokes. That says one of two things:
1. you actually are funny and broke your no-humor lentness or
2. I really do laugh at everything.

Or...it could be a combination of both. I'm glad Easter comes soon because the funny you is much better than the somber one.

Laura Lee said...

I laughed. And I don't laugh at everything.

Good luck on the remainder of your joke fast! But I think you're inevitably funny. Sorry Jon, there's not much you can do about it!

Rhett said...

I was going to say.... "hey I heard you make at least 2 jokes thats night!" (the basketball joke and the jarem's mom joke).

But you caught them.

I will now go pull out every funny movie you have an put it on your bed. They make me laugh.

Anonymous said...

I would have laughed were I with you. Speaking of which, I have a ton of New Yorkers. Do you still want them?

Maker said...

#2 works for me. Ha! Because it is generally my approach.

blyszy!! (That was the word verification. I like it so I am going to keep it.)

Anonymous said...

I have been told by more than one guy that I use humor to hide my emotions. They would get mad that when they would share feelings and I felt awkward, I would crack a joke. Well those boys suck. How can you not make jokes and stop feeling uncomfortable!

I like your jokes. I am a big fan of movie quotes no one notices so they think you are so funny.