Tuesday, November 28, 2006

slaying the eborsisk

Completely wasting my time has finally paid off.

Remember my friends Steve and Antonio? They were first introduced here and previously seen in the shadows here. Did you read that first link? It's actually pretty important. I spent a lot of time on it so I probably won't repeat much of it. Let me just sum up. Last summer I watched a gameshow on VH-1 called The World Series of Pop Culture. I pretty much knew every answer. My friends Steve and Antonio expressed interest that the three of us should put a team together and try out.

I went with the flow with the understanding that usually these kinds of things just fizzle out. Well, a few hours ago Steve informed me that our applications were in and we would be taking a written pop-culture test on January 27th and a regional qualifier on the 28th. Our team name is "Out of the Way Peck!"

Let me just say that I am a very untalented and insecure in most areas, but am SUPREMELY confident in our abilities in this context. If they think us camera-worthy, we will win. I have a very broad pop culture knowledge with specialties in cartoons, teen flicks, light sci-fi and modern music. I believe Steve and Antonio are slightly more specific in their knowledge but they are freaking surgeons at film noir, cult classics and directors.

This isn't to say that we won't prepare at all. We plan on getting together and playing some trivia games, doing a little study, hanging out at imdb.com, etc. We also need people to regularly quiz us with any type of pertinent information. What we need the most help on will probably be costumes. So far my idea is for the three of us to wear viking horns with t-shirts that say "Outof," "theWay" and "Peck." Please, if you have a better idea, let me know.

From now on, all my leisure time will be devoted to preparation. I'll probably be renting a few more movies than usual. Better start with Willow.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

virtually disastrous

It all started with the stupid Second Life. That's this virtual online world started by a few people, but maintained and continually created by thousands of online users. Apparently this other world has been steadily built over the years and now would occupy hundreds of acres if it literally existed. The Second Life users seemingly actually inhabit this visual online world. They also trade in various non-real and real world items. Users can take virtual matter and visually adjust it to take on whatever appearance they want. Then they program these items to do whatever they want them to do. Then they sell these items. Apparently, $500,000 runs through the Second Life commerce system everyday. Actual musicians and lecturers make appearances in Second Life. Real world people are actually quitting their real-world jobs to make their fortunes in fantasy land.

Naturally, I want in. I guess I just feel a need to escape from my life of non-stop leisure, endless sushi and a rocking girlfriend.

Secondlife.com seemed welcoming enough. I went ahead and filled a profile out for myself. My visual self (avatar) I selected is a sort of Japanese schoolgirl. They wanted me to join the premium membership for 10 bucks a month. Since I was gung-ho about immersing myself in the virtual world, the thought of such a membership was actually tempting. I was also tempted to register with my credit card. They wouldn't automatically take money but it would enable my avatar to purchase whatever she wanted immediately.

Fortunately I didn't do anything at all financial. After downloading the software on the website and building my avatar I began my Second Life maiden voyage by actually beginning the program. 30 seconds after clicking the Second Life icon I got a message informing me that Second Life couldn't run with my current graphics card. It recommended updating my video drivers, which I attempted to download -- over and over again. Why don't I understand computer drivers? Drivers are like the emo of computers. I never could understand the actual definition of emo. I finally settled on the idea that I needed an entirely new graphics card.

I meticulously jotted down the suggested cards Secondlife.com provided me. One of them was the ATI Radeon 9250. I picked it up when Maria and I went to Best Buy to look for extra televisions.

This brings up two tangents.

Yes, I am shopping for televisions -- well, just one TV anyway. I figured it was time to get a new TV when the coaxial socket in the back slightly broke and got shoved into the TV's interior. Peter Nash was aghast when I actually told him that I'm looking into getting a smaller TV. He figures it's a step down and not worth doing. He's got a pretty good point, but there are certain facts that contribute to my wanting to downgrade. My current TV can only fit in my room if I plop it in my easy chair recliner. When I watch TV while the TV itself is in my recliner it really makes me wonder who's boss. I have this tiny TV tray-stand wheelie thing that I scrounged from my grandma's house which fits into the mini-corner in the middle of my north wall. The largest TV that can fit on that thing is 18.5 inches wide. I'm not talkin' an 18 inch screen here. I'm talkin' 18 inches for the entire box... not diagonally. Actually, I'm sort of looking forward to having a cute little TV. It'll be more convenient to haul it around for stuff like Halo parties plus I can easily maneuver the TV stand to enjoy the TV from my bed or easy chair. And yes, Mom, I know I could have taken Grandma's TV, but I wasn't thinking about getting a new one a couple of weeks ago when you asked me and also I need one with a headphone jack and stereo RCA inputs.

Tangent #2... After Maria and I went to Best Buy we went to Target and saw a line of people camped out in a line outside. We assumed that they were waiting for the Nintendo Wii which I think was going to be released the next day. Inside Target we found the Wii display with appropriate worthless display boxes. We considered snatching one of the display boxes as we walked out of the store. It would have given me the opportunity to have what looked like a Nintendo Wii under my arm when I asked the people in line what they were in line for.

So anyway, I came home and attempted to install the new graphics card. I've never installed a graphics card before (to my recollection), but figured it was easier than putting in a zip drive or fixing a toaster (two things I have been successful at). One of the first things it asked me to do was to remove the computer's pre-existing video drivers. Eegad. Drivers. They freak me out. Video drivers especially. The instruction manual didn't mention a scenario that I totally envisioned happening. Suppose I shut off the video drivers, shut the computer off, install the new card and then find that I get no video anyway, because the video drivers are gone and I can't install the new video drivers if I can't see anything. Hmmm. Also, I wasn't even sure which drivers were the video drivers. At that point I just went to the standard add/remove programs screen instead of going to display adapters in the device manager menu.

Man! This must be wicked boring for all you people out there who consistently rely on your company's IT guy. Sorry.

Anyway, as I was cycling through all the drivers I had at my disposal I decided to click on one whose function I was unsure of. Now, naturally, I figured that the computer would inform me which driver I was selecting instead of instantly deleting it. Imagine my surprise as I helplessly watched a series of prompts informing me that the driver was being completely removed from the system. During the damage assessment I discovered the drivers I removed were the audio drivers instead of the video drivers.

After a delirium of hair-pulling and crying, I managed to get the audio drivers back and downloaded (a few hours later). For some strange reason with all the fail-safes we encounter in Windows every single day, there's no 'undo' for deleting all the audio drivers. So I finally found what I was supposed to delete and got rid of them, despite my fear that I'd never see anything on the monitor again.

Now I was finally ready to install the graphics card. I cracked open the computer's frame and awkwardly ripped out what I supposed was an obsolete card. Then I spent the next 45 minutes trying to jam the new card into the new system. Yeah, after 45 minutes I finally resigned to the fact that my computer didn't have the right PCI slot for the brand new card I got. I sighed and plugged the old one in, praying that everything would still work when I got it back together.

And so it did. I'm totally back where I started, but 85 bucks poorer. I'm hoping Best Buy will take their card back even though I affixed the proof of purchase sticker and also wrote in the instruction manual. Maybe Intrigue Computers will be able to provide the thing with a new PCI slot (if that's even possible) next time I take it in. Hopefully, a solution could be had. People download and enjoy Second Life every single day...why can't I be one of them? You'd think computers and I would get along by now.

Second Life better be wicked good. On second thought, I hope it sucks, because it looks like I'll never go there.

she smashed the radio with the board of education

I never officially said this, but Maria and I started going out like a month or so ago. We decided we wouldn't do some kind of press release detailing our relationship, but instead see how long it would be before everyone's noticed. Well now 99% of everyone I know has noticed, so the thrill of keeping a relationship secret is now gone. So here it is for everyone I haven't talked to in the last month or so. Here's the press release.

(hi honey!)

Friday, November 10, 2006

hardly any reason for this post at all

So there's a really good chance that Abel won't be in on Monday so I gotta think of a few things to talk about for Monday's show. Of course since I'm catering to dozens of fans rather than thousands I could just run a replay. Of course with the same thinking in mind, I could just not worry about who I offend and totally pull a Network moment. Then again maybe I'll pretend we're in the third grade and just read aloud for an hour. The FreeCapitalist himself pulled that stunt once.

So anyway I'm considering talking about Guns 'N Roses cancelling their Maine show because they wouldn't be allowed to drink on stage. Read about it here. Boy, Axl! Talk about missing the ultimate rock 'n roll moment! A true rockstar would have at least broken the law and put on a great show. You just showed that you suck in every way.

Also, I went to Wal-Mart for some reason tonight. Some guy tried to watch me while I tried to play Guitar Hero II. That's not the point I'm trying to make, though. My cashier greeted me friendily. I suppose I mildly appreciated it until I swiped my debit card and before I could proceed with my transaction, the machine asked me "Did your cashier greet you today?" Suddenly all the sincerity that may have been in the original greeting was completely sucked away.

So obviously I'm against Wal-Mart using me to observe the friendliness of their workers. The last thing I need is someone begrudgingly saying hi to me for the sole reason that statistics are being compiled.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

day of the dead and bloated ii

Just about the hardest thing about keeping a regular blog is trying to figure out a clever title for the entries. Fortunately I realized just today that I've been keeping a blog for just over a year now and I can start re-using titles now that the same events are happening over again.

So I guess I can finally relax now that Halloween is over again. It really is more stressful than Christmas now. It should be, as it's the final barrier keeping Christmas preparations from spilling into July. Unfortunately there were some casualties this year. We weren't able to make a film, which I feel sort of guilty about. We have the means, the energy and the locale but inspiration just flew out the window. Hopefully a film will get made before Halloween next year (and it doesn't necessarily need to fall in the Halloween season -- I'm up for the scary business year round (not just when I have an excuse)). No trick-or-treaters came to my new house; at least not that that I know of. It didn't help that I arrived home at like 8:30 and I found that our porchlight doesn't work at the moment. Looks like I'll have to get really depressed and eat all the caramel Reese's Cups and LaffyTaffys all by myself.

I am happy to say that although I didn't finish the lyrics in time, J.R. and I were able to finish this year's Halloween CD. Here's the playlist:

1 Nothing to Fear (But Fear Itself)- Oingo Boingo
2 The Night is Young - Nosferatu
3 Splintered in Her Head - The Cure
4 Is She Weird - The Pixies
5 Light Years - 311
6 Boogie Monster - Gnarls Barkley
7 Psychic Voodoo Doll - Deadbolt
8 Iron Head - Rob Zombie
9 Red Right Hand - Nick Cave
10 Tubular Bells - Book of Love
11 WitchCraft - Frank Sinatra
12 Scary Monsters - David Bowie
13 Torture - The Jacksons
14 Overkill - Men at Work
15 Sell My Soul - Midnight Oil
16 Zee Deveel - Incubus
17 Hellraiser - Ozzie Ozbourne
18 I will Follow You Into the Dark - Death Cab For Cutie
19 Straight To Hell - The Clash

Every song can be individually emailed to you if you so desire to partake. J.R. did an excellent job mixing the film audio with the music, especially for Nothing to Fear (But Fear Itself) and I Will Follow You Into the Dark. I need to get crackin' on those lyrics before J.R. removes me as Co-President of Jon.R Productions.

Oh yeah! Costumes! Check this shiz out:

Hmm. Blogger doesn't seem to be accepting my photos. I'll put them here as soon as I can. Rest assured they are pretty awesome. If I can never get the photos up let me just tell you: I went as The Crow. Actually, I guess that's not actually his name; it's just the name of the movie. Hmm. I went as the guy in The Crow. The girls bought freaky dolls and dresseds as them. My friend Joe dressed as Danialsan dressed as a shower before he gets the crap beaten out of him by ninja skeletons.


Hmm. I guess I'll add the other photos when blogger isn't having a cow (I had to upload the above image as a file rather than a picture so I couldn't format it the same way I normally do).

I've already said this in other media, but I'll go ahead and reinstate here really quick. I don't like the idea of guys dressing like male strippers. Apparently it has become really popular this year I've noticed. I guess the girls are into it, which really makes me regret all the support I've given to girls dressing like the equivalent of prostitutes every year. Oh well, I may not be so social next Halloween. I may become an oldschool Halloween hermit who cares more about the scares than the bares (sorry, that rhyme was pretty groany).

So yeah, I ranted all about that on The Abel Hour yesterday. We had a special show with Scott Johnson, the guy from myextralife.com. He's no slouch in the broadcasting department. He runs his own very entertaining geek podcast and he's been a guest with us before with stuff like this. Anyway, I had a lot to say about Halloween (and Star Trek for some reason) and if you want to, the broadcast is right here (you may as well download it by right clicking instead of just clicking because it's sort of big and you're not gonna wanna have to re-load it when you play it for your friends later)