aloha until the next aloha

Alrighty, I'm off to Hawaii -- more specifically Kauai (see printed out mapquest picture)!
Here are some illegal Foxtrot scans about Hawaii.

myoozingz

Maria's beating me at blogging this week. That's a total first.

Anyhoo, we've been together for a year. She's not lying. It's just totally breezed by. If you read my blog, you undoubtedly read hers so this would be old news to you.

We celebrated by going to this place called The Melting Pot this last Tuesday. You go in there and you dip stuff into boiling cheese. I decided I wanted the Swiss combo, but before we ordered we asked the server what he thought of it and he said that it's the one dish that people ask to be taken back the most often. Surprisingly, Maria said we still ought to get it and I think I know why. It wasn't because she was setting up an ambush where she could blame me for not liking it. It wasn't. It actually was because she knows I like it when she tries new things and if she didn't like it, she knew it would be a good excuse to come back later and try something else.

Maria gave me Metroid Prime 3: Corruption for the Wii that night. I just got her flowers, which you can totally see at her blog (as well as her (better) account of what happened that night). They're really nice flowers and all but after the Swiss thing and the video game, it's totally obvious that I totally made out with far more loot than she did (as usual). Actually, it would have been nice if the server talked us out of the Swiss thing. I totally adore Swiss cheese, but I have no doubt that a less crazy flavor would have been more enjoyable. Yeah, if you go to The Melting Pot, take our words for it and stay away from the Swiss.

We love the movie Hot Rod. There's an homage scene to Footloose that is completely hilarious. There's also the best "falling down a hill" scene yet put on film (and these are back-to-back too). So we were with friends tonight and we wanted to get everyone together to see it, but are realizing we may not even be able to until halfway through next month. It's almost depressing because we're having so much fun with stuff that we have no time to do semi-menial fun stuff like just hitting up the dollar movie. In the next few weeks a bunch of us are heading to Hawai'i. Yeah, Mom, I know I haven't told you yet, but I didn't want to tell you until right before I left so that you wouldn't fret about it for more than a few weeks. After that we're going to Las Vegas to hit up the BYU game (but really just to go to Vegas). Plus, October will be filled with scary movies, haunted houses and Lagoon on the weekends. When am I supposed to watch Hot Rod? Sometimes I miss having fewer friends so that I had to just go see movies I wanted to see (alone).

I was checking out Wikipedia earlier to really find out what the title of the book A Wind in the Door means. By doing so, I discovered that Madeleine L'Engle died like a couple of weeks ago! How tragic. To commemorate her death, I put the TV movie A Wrinkle in Time on my girlfriend's roommate's Netflix queue. Apparently L'Engle said of the movie "I have glimpsed it... I expected it to be bad, and it is" shortly before she died. I still don't know what "a wind in the door" means.

Speaking of quotation marks, have you checked out http://quotation-marks.blogspot.com?

I laughed out loud earlier this week at a random Simpsons quote from forever ago that just popped into my head. It's when Apu says something about Homer to the effect of, "Never have I seen someone take such liberal use of the 'leave a penny, take a penny' rule." The reason I laughed out loud is because there are two ways to "get" the joke. The first is how absurd it is that Apu would complain about something so minor. The second, and I think more funny possibility is that Apu actually has a right to complain and Homer is taking so much advantage of the penny tray to the degree that he stakes the Qwik-E-Mart out and "cleans it out" every hour or so.

In the evenings, Maria and I have been watching my DVDs of two awesome shows: Firefly (mentioned previously) and 30 Rock. I swear, a bad episode of those shows was never made and that's just joyous.

I got a swell temporary tattoo from the gumball machines at Wal-Mart. I got it to get myself pumped for the stake softball tournament Saturday morning that we only got to play two games of. It's the sweetest temporary tattoo I've ever gotten. The last two that came out of those machines were El Caminos.

Maria gets mad at me whenever I say a guy looks attractive, because she doesn't like me even joking around aboutthat kind of stuff even though I don't think I do it that bad. So I'm sorry when I say I think I look really good in that cheesy dragon tat picture.

life goals accomplished: one

eprozac

I just got off the phone with the chiropractic office I've been shrugging off for a month. Instead of just telling them to go away I just said I was really busy. Now I'm at work sorting through different printed cds. Some printed off too red with too little green. I need figure out which ones are passable. I'm colorblind. I haven't seen Rise of the Silver Surfer yet and I predicted that it would be THE movie sequel event of the summer. Maria's been super busy at work. It's getting cold. Last night I found out that my favorite living band that I've never seen live, The White Stripes, have cancelled their upcoming show due to Meg White's acute anxiety. I should have gone to the Muse show to make up for it, but their show was a couple of hours before I found out about the Stripes' shrugging me off.

My life is really really fantastic. But at this very moment I could use some cheering up.

While you're at it, send a positive line to Meg White. She might need it more than I do.

coping through insensitivity

Since it is September 11th I probably should say something. I got nothin' really. I guess Osama bin Laden sent out another tape a few days ago urging Americans to convert to Islam. He probably also said that such behavior would lead to less Al-Qaeda attacks. At least I think he mentioned something like that. Lately my unfamiliarity with the news has only been matched by my illiteracy in actually looking such stuff up.

Anyway, when I heard about the new tape last week, I thought it could be the basis of a wonderfully hilarious video of my own where I would put on a fake beard (similar to the one that Osama may be wearing in his video), put a towel on my head and proclaim that I had converted to Islam. I'd then give a tour of my house that would be filled with Camel cigarettes and posters of the WWF wrestler The Iron Sheik and simple phrases like "Islam is so hot right now." The camera would follow me outside where I'd reveal my full address and leave detailed instructions to fly planes into all my neighbors' homes but not into mine. Then the camera would reveal the tarp on top of the house which says in big letters "OLLUH RULEZ!" Maybe I'd spell it right or not do that part at all. Misspelling the name of God could be considered blasphemous not only to all Muslims, but also to all monotheistic religions since, from what I understand, the name "Allah" isn't so much a name as it is the word for God in Arabic. So maybe I'd switch the tarp to "BIN LADEN ROCKS HARD!" Going back to the controversial phrase, we go all John Lennon on this and say "BIN LADEN IS BIGGER THAN ALLAH!" Whoa. If he got blamed for that phrase, it could start up all sorts of stuff.

Anyway, the point is the video clip would be the kind of viral youtube stuff that gets mega-popular and would certainly be seen by the bearded guy. Then, when my house isn't attacked by terrorists, bin Laden would totally lose some serious cred.

Happy September 11th. Hang in there World.

Check out my other teeny tiny September 11th entry from last year right here.

daffy laffy taffy 2

Observe this Laffy Taffy joke on the right. Notice the question and notice the answer. Got it?

Now, read the following tiny news blurb found here.

Does anybody know Shara from Oklahoma? If you do, please please forward this along to her.

Thanks.