Tuesday, September 11, 2007

coping through insensitivity

Since it is September 11th I probably should say something. I got nothin' really. I guess Osama bin Laden sent out another tape a few days ago urging Americans to convert to Islam. He probably also said that such behavior would lead to less Al-Qaeda attacks. At least I think he mentioned something like that. Lately my unfamiliarity with the news has only been matched by my illiteracy in actually looking such stuff up.

Anyway, when I heard about the new tape last week, I thought it could be the basis of a wonderfully hilarious video of my own where I would put on a fake beard (similar to the one that Osama may be wearing in his video), put a towel on my head and proclaim that I had converted to Islam. I'd then give a tour of my house that would be filled with Camel cigarettes and posters of the WWF wrestler The Iron Sheik and simple phrases like "Islam is so hot right now." The camera would follow me outside where I'd reveal my full address and leave detailed instructions to fly planes into all my neighbors' homes but not into mine. Then the camera would reveal the tarp on top of the house which says in big letters "OLLUH RULEZ!" Maybe I'd spell it right or not do that part at all. Misspelling the name of God could be considered blasphemous not only to all Muslims, but also to all monotheistic religions since, from what I understand, the name "Allah" isn't so much a name as it is the word for God in Arabic. So maybe I'd switch the tarp to "BIN LADEN ROCKS HARD!" Going back to the controversial phrase, we go all John Lennon on this and say "BIN LADEN IS BIGGER THAN ALLAH!" Whoa. If he got blamed for that phrase, it could start up all sorts of stuff.

Anyway, the point is the video clip would be the kind of viral youtube stuff that gets mega-popular and would certainly be seen by the bearded guy. Then, when my house isn't attacked by terrorists, bin Laden would totally lose some serious cred.

Happy September 11th. Hang in there World.

Check out my other teeny tiny September 11th entry from last year right here.

2 Comments:

Blogger J.R. said...

I my particular cell will refrain from bombing your house.

September 11, 2007 9:50 PM  
Blogger J.R. said...

Speaking of coping, did you see that the White Stripes canceled all their remaining tour dates through the year? That sure sucks for you folks in Utah who were going to the show in 1 week.

September 12, 2007 9:18 PM  

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