happy thanksgiving

something's wrong with the universe

I just got back from the annual torture which is the BYU-UofU football game. Last year I actually attended the game in the middle of red square where there was this girl in front of us who yelled "F*** BYU! Go Utes!" over and over. When BYU's band came out to play at half-time, she yelled "F*** BYU's band!" In the fourth quarter (a few beers later) she accidently slipped up and yelled "F*** Utes! Go B -- I mean F*** BYU! Go Utes!" After being very patient with her all game, I said to her kindly, "Hey, hey... you shouldn't badmouth your own team like that! C'mon! Be supportive! They need you." She pouted and then turned around in a huff and said quietly, "F*** off!" That little story was the ONLY good thing that happened last year.

Up through the first half of this year's game, things were even worse than last year. We were supposed to win easily, but Utah was ahead 24-3 at halftime. BYU made a game of it in the third and fourth quarter, and when the time ran out it was tied at 34. Utah immediately scored and BYU fell apart. So it was better than last year (when BYU was the final notch in Utah's undefeated season), but it's still crappy.

I think there are several reasons why Utah won. One reason is because BYU performed some kind of "haka" dance before the game to get pumped up. The haka is the absolute worst way to get pumped up. For any of you who don't know, hakas are polynesian war dances that the warriors would perform before battle. I'm pretty sure that the British opened fire on the Maoris of New Zealand as they were performing this dance on the open field. Another reason is because BYU has way too many old people attending the games and they don't pump up the team much. Utah doesn't have nearly as many elderly alumni because most of them succombed to death early as a result of years of alcohol abuse. The other reason is because... I honestly don't know. It's something supernatural. Something evil, though. Not Godly destiny like so many people in red believe.

Now I have to deal with snide Utah fans all year. One of these crazy fans is my bishop. He and most of my other Ute church friends have a pretty distorted belief that there's an unlimited amount hating they can make on my school. I think this stems from the stereotype that everyone who goes to BYU is proud and judgmental. Admittedly, I'm actually pretty proud and judgmental, but just about everybody I knew in school wasn't nearly as bad as I was and certainly not nearly as bad as most Ute fans I've met (and most people don't think I'm all that bad). Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't believe the stereotypes (even though Ute fans definitely won't take my little alcoholism joke in jest). It's pretty interesting: depending on a stereotype of judgmentality to justify one's own judgmentality. It's a truly unique social phenomenon. Anyhow, I've dealt with lots of Utes over the course of my years. Not all of them are like they guy I saw in a red shirt that said, "My testimony is stronger than yours." Most of them are actually like the guy in the shirt that simply read "Go Utes!" (with a picture of a giant middle finger).

The University of Utah isn't all that bad. There are some good folks there. They got that cold fusion thing goin' and all that. I almost went to the U. Sometimes I wish I did, it seems like it could've been a real fun place. But ALL forms of herpes kind of disgust me, so it's probably good that I didn't.

mode a la mode

Just about everybody I knew, including all three of my roommates, had business Friday night. Where most people would see despair, I saw a great opportunity. Friday night became the NIGHT OF JON. I blasted my five-disc changer with The Bravery cd as well as four Depeche Mode discs. I put one television to Spike's showing of The Warriors and I played hours and hours of video games on the other one. I've already mentioned that I just got a new video game and I was pretty anxious to sink my teeth more into it. I also got a demo cd in the mail that had playable versions of some cool new stuff like Star Wars Battlefront II and We Love Katamari. It reminded me of the good old days before I had a ton of friends. Back then I used to relish my Saturday nights where I'd watch Monstervision. Monstervision was this great show that used to be on TNT where they just show two old fantasy/horror/sci-fi movies and in commercial breaks this rednecky guy named Joe Bob Briggs told us what he thought of the action thus far. Some people may think it's pathetic to watch four hours of B-movie schlop every Saturday night. For me, it was the best time of the week. Friday was a whole wicked lot similar to the old Saturdays of yore.

So why was I blasting The Bravery and Depeche Mode? We all know the answer to that question. Saturday night Depeche Mode came to our own E Center and the Killer-hating Bravery opened up for them. My old friend Kristen won the "who wants to go see Depeche Mode with Jon and maybe throw in a couple of bucks?" contest. When she and I were neighbors after she borrowed my Songs of Faith and Devotion she wrote to me a note that said something like: "Wow, I didn't realize music that great was possible." I'm pretty sure she was just buttering me up so that I'd take her to an actual Depeche Mode show years later. So I totally have to apologize to some other girls who may have wanted to go. Kristen was the biggest fan I knew who wanted to go. I was worried about taking somebody who wasn't as big a fan because the band is so different. Synthesizers, backing tape, age -- they have a lot going against them in the live department. Looking back though, I'm sorry I didn't drag more friends along.

Here's an actual image from the show!

Okay fine, camera phones don't work that well. I put some other images from other shows that I got on depechemode.com down below.

We came in later than we should have toward the middle of The Bravery's set. They were good and that's all I need to say about them. Depeche Mode took stage a little after nine. Their set was even weirder than the other three times I've seen them. Their keyboard stations looked like terminals from Lost In Space. There was a flying saucer looking thing with the words "sex," "pain," "angel," "love," "vice," and something else on the other side that I couldn't see affixed to the side. Every once in a while one of the words would light up at appropriate meaningful times during the show. I was glad to find that, I was right, most of the songs really are about sex. They had six screens in the back which they utilized differently than usual The other three times I've seen them there was one straight screen in the back that displayed films specifically made for each song. They did a little of that, but most of the time the screens displayed live, yet erratic, images of the band.

Here's the setlist (songs with asterisks are from the new cd):
> Intro> *A Pain That I'm Used To> *John The Revelator> A Question Of Time> Policy Of Truth> *Precious> Walking In My Shoes> *Suffer Well> *Damaged People> Home> *I Want It All> *The Sinner In Me> I Feel You> Behind The Wheel> World In My Eyes> Personal Jesus> Enjoy The Silence
encore>> Somebody> Just Can't Get Enough> Everything Counts
encore #2> Never Let Me Down Again> Goodnight Lovers

Can I just say that Dave Gahan is one of the slickest cats I've ever seen? He knows how to move his body better than any man I know. He uses the mic stand almost like a male pole-dancer might. He slides along the stage like a reptile. He spins like coked-out ballet guy. Over the past 25 years in a band where they play behind keyboards, all of the live work has been on his shoulders and he's honed it immaculately.

Martin Gore, the mastermind of the band, reminds me of the live awkwardness of Robert Smith. Gore, no showman but goofy in his own right took to the stage in a fake black mohawk and dark angel wings. I guess it let us know who the real guy playing the angel is.

There were a few interesting surprises in some of the songs. The versions of "Walking In My Shoes" and "Home" were unrecognizable arrangements at first. In the middle of "Never Let Me Down Again" shifted to the remixed arrangement bonus track from Music for the Masses that sounds nothing like the original song. Oh, and speaking of, I'm actually kind of sick of waving my arms to that song the way Dave makes us do it. I've done it five times now.

The first encore was a total shock. They played three old songs they didn't have to (Although we were pretty disappointed that "Master and Servant" wasn't played despite "Master and Servant" t-shirts being sold). For the first time, "Somebody" didn't get the massive unusual crowd response it's gotten in the past. We got to sing the chorus of "Everything Counts" a cappella, which sounded just as awesome as the famous audience participation of it on 101. My friend J.B. actually didn't make it to the show (he gave his tickets to my other friend J.R.'s brother Josh and his wife). If J.B. made it though, he would have disowned Depeche Mode as soon as they started playing "Just Can't Get Enough."

With "Just Can't Get Enough," they had a truly unique setlist composed of legitimate Depeche Mode tunes written by Vince Clarke, Martin Gore and David Gahan. Usually the whole show is Martin tunes (considering he wrote 95% of the Depeche Mode canon). Anyway, Dave sang two of the three songs he wrote for the new cd ("Suffer Well," "I Want It All"), which were adequate, but pretty dull too. "Suffer Well" would have been sufficient. I was also perplexed by Martin's vocal inclusion of "Damaged People" when "Macro" would have been a better choice. "Lilian" and "The Darkest Star" were curiously missing from the setlist considering they are two of the best new songs and "Star" contains the lyric "playing the angel," which would fit well in a tour called "Touring the Angel." Depeche Mode always insist on playing too heavy on their most recent cd, which honestly was awesome when I saw them a few months after Songs of Faith and Devotion (my favorite cd ever) came out. They played 7 of the 11 vocal tracks from Playing the Angel (and I actually preferred some of the new songs they didn't play). In my opinion, they've been around too long to be messing with the stuff people don't care enough about.

Harping on the new stuff aside, the show really, really rocked. "A Question of Time" is a standard I've heard done by them five times if I include David Gahan's solo show. It's also got a riff I never get tired of hearing. The flying saucer displayed a three and a half minute countdown during the song which sort of upped the urgency. "Personal Jesus" relied more heavily on Martin's guitar than ever before. Live, it was far more intense than Marilyn Manson's version. "I Feel You," undoubtedly the loudest, rawest Depeche Mode song was a delightful energetic highlight. It was a little awkward with Kristen there, however, since the screens didn't display the band, but instead displayed a girl eager to lose her clothes.

Notable exceptions: "Halo" (a usual live staple and also my very favorite song ever), "Stripped," "People Are People" (never much liked the song, but it probably the one I've heard the most on the radio), "Strangelove," "Condemnation," "Master and Servant" (already mentioned that), "The Bottom Line" (a pretty obscure one, but one of my favorites and I know they do it live on some occasions), "It's No Good," "Dream On" and "I Feel Loved." Maybe next time when they release another greatest hits compilation.

Have you ever noticed that bands rarely play a ton of stuff from their second to last album? "Goodnight Lovers" was the only song from Exciter, but I never realized just how beautiful and fitting a closing song it is. Instead of spanning the stage like they did all night Dave and Martin performed it huddled right next to each other right in front of Andy Fletcher's keyboard pod. It was cozy and warm and a very weird way to end a Depeche Mode show. But it totally worked. At the end of your next wicked long day, get out Exciter and sit back and listen to "Goodnight Lovers." It's blissy.

Wow that's it (three days later)! I can't wait to do this again in three years or so. And get excited for the next show because I really want you to come with me this time.

hell no dolly

Caught New York Doll last night. Quite beautiful. Before I ever heard of the movie I had heard a lot about the New York Dolls. I knew they were practically transvestites, the lead singer became the Buster Poindexter alter-ego and that just about every early punk and new wave band that I respected directly cited the Dolls as a very important influence. They were so mythical that I never even heard a Dolls song before the movie. By the time I heard about the movie I had no idea that one of the members became a Mormon. The thought of that was absurd. Whenever I put on make-up and womens' clothes I think about how un-Mormon I'm being. Strangely, the movie sorts every conflict between piousness and rock 'n roll. Although mentioned, the hedonistic excess of the rock lifestyle aren't emphasized. Our hero wants to return to that world not because he misses the drugs and sex, but for serious spiritual reasons. He again wanted to bring happiness and make life better for those around him and he knew he had a great talent doing that as an entertainer. All the Dolls seemed to have this ideal. More importantly he wanted to re-connect with his former bandmates. He worked at the family history center connecting families to one another and his band was really his estranged family. For once in my life, my religion and my passion for rock music are the same. They're about loving each other. I gotta tell ya, I knew how the movie was going to end, but... I... promisediwouldnt... c... cry.

Go see it. Morrissey is in it! MORRISSEY!

calling all beautiful music fans!

This Saturday my very favorite music band, Depeche Mode, is coming to Utah. By absolutely no coincidence, I have tickets. I need somebody to go with me. If you're a beautiful girl and you're at least a fair-weather fan of me or the band, let me know. Also let me know how much you're willing to pay for a ticket. I'll take the girl with the best beauty-to-ticket payment ratio (or I might just take my brother or something). Seriously, let me know. I HAVE A TICKET FOR YOU (possibly). If you don't want to go, tell all your semi-gothic synth-pop oldschool eighties mistresses. Maybe THEY want to go.

Awwwwww.

Before I stop talking about Halloween, I just had to include this photo of my niece Anna Kate and my nephew Charlie. Charlie grew his hair just to be an awesome Dash. Unfortunately, Anna Kate isn't introverted enough to pull off a convincing Violet, but she's still super super cute anyway.

Hey family, hope you had an awesome Halloween!

day of the dead and bloated

Pictures are pending! Halloween FINALLY came to an end last night, which was really the only actual night of Halloween. Best Halloween in years and years. The past couple have been especially lame. My house really really really came through.

I mentioned that we submitted two very fabulous scary movies to the ward film festival. I did one and Rhett did one. The link to my movie is right here. It's a really big file, so I'm going to prepare a lower-quality internet version to more easily download right here. Also, if you want, you can download the director's commentary version right here. Rhett's movie can be downloaded right here.

We won best group costume at the ward party by going as each original member of KISS (I was Ace, Rhett was Gene, Joe was Paul and we stuck Clint with Peter Criss). The pictures are on the way. In the meantime, see the previous post for a quickie of me. We won a pretty hard bag of snickers.

After all that we invited everybody over to our place for root beer and dancing. Strangely, EVERYBODY actually came. Actually even more than that. We must've been the only party around because quite a few cruisers came in. We didn't know half the ilk who showed. A good time was had though. Even my brilliant, yet Debbie Downer-esque, friend Maria danced all night. This is strange because we never see her dance, but she does talk about dancing all the time. Now if only we had a little more Halloweeny-type music. Anyway, apparently Maria caught a couple getting freaky in my room. I've never even gotten freaky in my room. She didn't get their names, but if you two are out there, I'd really really like your pictures for the purposes of my blog.

So summing up: scored hard on self-made movies, won hard on costumes and was the central location for freaking and getting freaky. We're almost done cleaning up.

On to Thanksgiving. *sigh*