Sunday, September 27, 2009

worse than hitler

So Tuesday I found myself at a softball game. I was planning on simply watching, which I hardly ever do, but it was my big excuse to go out and I gladly took it. Not thinking, I wore my awesome velvet Chuck Taylors and some non-holy thick jeans Joe gave me because they're "too tight in his thighs."

Anyway, If I was thinking, I not only would have worn shorts or something, but I would have also brought my mitt. Turns out the team playing was short a player, because Rhett had double-booked his sporting events and was playing soccer at the exact same time. Joe was there to sub-in for someone else and suggested I play. I was glad to play, I was just slightly uncomfortable. I don't know how basketball players ever played basketball in Chuck Taylors in the 50s or whenever, because Chucks are more designed for... I dunno... sitting really.

Also, I didn't have a glove. One of the guys on the team ran up to the officiator's box and managed to borrow one for me, which was awesome.

All the other guys took the time to learn my name and cheer me on. Real cool. Thing is, I was taking Rhett's place, so I was put on the roster as "Rhett." I couldn't just "join the team." I had to be someone already on the team or there would be a potential forfeit. Strangely, Joe was the only one who yelled "Good job Rhett!" when I'd hit the ball or do some other awesome monumental play. So obviously when everyone else yelled "Good job Jon!" things were quite suspicious.

After the game, I thought I'd run the glove up to the box myself. Silly idea. I hoped to just throw it in there, but I sort of had to ask who to give it to and the commotion made the officiator-lady (it seems like officiator-ladies are way more anal about stuff like this) take the glove back and ask, "What's your name?"

Me: *big pause* "... Rhett." (Of course I figured she COULD have been specifically asking my name on the team, but I totally knew what was up)

Her: "Okay good, because there was some confusion as to who you were out there and if you really belonged here."

I didn't correct her.

I suppose that's lying right? Usually I don't actually lie unless I lie to myself first so I actually believe what I'm saying.

To be fair, it's not like we pulled some huge scam. Our team lost by about 15 runs. I'm no ringer. Surely, if this city league game were to be called off because of a last-minute substitution the other team would be plenty angry that their hitting stats would be erased.

To further the silly matter, this kind of thing happens all the time in leagues such as these. We're busy sometimes and other times we got time to fill in for people who are. When I suddenly found myself in the position, all I wanted to do was lend a hand to the team -- not piss them all off by not being more Rhetty and announcing it.

Anyway, I'm sorry. Maybe this helps. More than likely not.

I only wish I lived in a world or a way or whatever where being dishonest isn't the obvious choice. I sort of want to believe in a world where everyone's at an advantage through honesty. Weird -- I know.


Blogger Monica said...

Gosh, dumb officiator-ladies...who needs 'em?

I'd like to live in a world where one could wear awesome velvet Chucks while playing a ball game or running a 5K or hiking or something without killin' their feet...the more widely accepted athletic gear these days is so uninspiring and inconveniently priced.

September 27, 2009 2:50 AM  
Blogger Saule Cogneur said...

Reality is always grey. Sometimes I agree with you and wish it could be different.

The sad part is that your issue exists at all. People need to chill out with their rules. Of course that's not justification for lying, but in times like these, I try to think about the bigger picture. I'd say the impact of your lie was pretty minimal.

Some will say this mindset is still rationalization blah blah blah. While it is important to be aware of our own morally ambivalent actions, I think it's also important to think about which ones matter and which don't. Life is too short to get caught up in all the stuff that doesn't matter.

September 27, 2009 9:21 AM  
Blogger jaime said...

I think there is a movie coming out with Ricky Gervais about how everyone has to be honest and always tell the truth. Maybe you should watch it and see if you still want that kind of world?? Also, I think that's the dumbest rule in softball that you have to forfeit if the guy isn't on the roster. It's not brain surgery!

September 28, 2009 10:14 AM  
Blogger Maker said...

You lie and stuff.

wv: gonsfult (almost sounds like Jon's fault)

October 03, 2009 10:04 AM  
Blogger Rania said...

How uncomfortable! I hate situations like that.

October 08, 2009 10:20 PM  
Blogger Craig Barlow B. said...

I pulled many tricks like this when I was constructing 5 to 12 year old South Valley Track Club relay teams. First, with the help of my dad, I often was able to be on mega-relay teams in my youth, made from the parts of lesser relay teams. Later in my life, when I became a coach of this club for the summer, I continued the cycle of deciet by helping my kids be on unbeatable teams with not always completely legitimate teammates. I have no regrets. I have blue ribbons.

October 09, 2009 7:13 PM  
Blogger Craig Barlow B. said...

Also, I apologize for spelling deceit wrong.

October 09, 2009 7:14 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home