v.d. 2011

(Patent pending on my trademark black horny heart.)

So here's an image of this year's Valentine's Day box.

Yes, you guessed right. My work is making us make Valentine's Day boxes to put at our desks. Actually, I don't want to sound like they're forcing me to do something I don't like, because I actually think it's a pretty fun idea. I also like how deeply awesome my box is. Black with white horn hearts plus a glass mockingjay on the top. Nobody can beat my V.D. box.

Every few years I make a V.D. cd. Usually I grab a few love songs and edit in a few quotes from popular romantic comedies. Often there's a sort of theme to the cd where there are love songs about loss that lead into love songs about gain or vice versa. This year I totally resolved to do it. I even started watching a few streaming Netflix titles to find movie quotes while I was researching which songs to use. I only got ten minutes into Roxanne before I gave up and just watched the whole thing. It was awesome to watch, btw. I recommend. Again. I recorded one line that was pretty funny ("I thought I was in love once, but it turns out I was confusing love with sex." -- "That happened to me once. It was awesome!")

Anyway, I only found five songs that I was willing to put on the V.D. cd, So I guess this year it's more of a V.D. EP.

1. "Next Girl" by the Black Keys. This song represents "being on the prowl."

2. "Father Figure" by George Michael. This song represents hooking up, in a really creepy sorta Freudian way. Ever see that video? Sexy (I'm not saying George Michael is sexy (even though he might be (back then anyway (to women)))).

3. "You're My Best Friend" by Queen. Hmm. That's sort of two gay songs in a row. That's totally coincidental. I'm not gay, but lots of times gay artists write my favorite songs (see of course Erasure). Actually I'm pretty sure it was John Deacon who wrote this Queen song and not Freddie Mercury. This may be the best love song I can think of right now. Anyway this song represents being in a fulfilling relationship.

4. "Nobody's Diary" by Yazoo. Okay, speaking of gay, I recently heard that this song is in a movie called Edge of Seventeen. Being the biggest Yazoo fan I could think of, I found the movie on Netflix streaming to see how well the song was used in the context of the movie. Turns out the movie is super gay. By super gay I don't mean to say that the movie is dumb. The movie literally is super gay. Anyway, I found the part with the Yaz song and they sort of used it well in the movie. Even in context of the super gay movie I find the first seven notes of the song absolutely haunting when I hear them. This song is very very high on my singing in the shower rotation. It's break-uppy. And it's sung by a girl. I'm not sure why I always sing sad girl songs in the shower. Have I ever talked about Yazoo on this blog? I think they were a really awesome '80s band that totally justified the emotion you could elicit through such a manufactured sound.

5. "Wildest Dreams" by The Moody Blues. Is that the name of this song? I know it's the song that all Moody Blues fans hate, but it's the only tolerable song of non-Moody Blues fans. It represents long lost longing.

So earlier this week I was pondering on the fact that I'm one of the few people who still loves listening to the radio in the car more than cds or iPod. Proponents of NOT listening to the radio always say the same thing: wouldn't you rather CHOOSE the music you listen to? Actually, strangely no. It's so much more fun to hear a song you love on the radio than to hear it from your personal collection. It's like receiving a gift. There's that thrill to it. Plus there's the knowledge that you're simultaneously sharing the same experience with dozens of other people across the Wasatch front.

I like anticipating what's next instead of owning the music. It's weird romance.

Have I ever mentioned that I find being poor more romantic than being rich? It sounds absurd to actually come out and say it, but isn't that what most romantic movies actually fall back on? The girl tends to wind up with the poor schlub than the rich douchebag.

Actually, also rich isn't an important aspect to romance because you don't want to mix up the material with the feelings. Poor romance is a lot easier to see, because love is the only material involved. That's why "Is This Love?" by Bob Marley is the most romantic song ever (sorry "You're My Best Friend" -- but I actually think I used "Is This Love?" on a previous V.D. cd).

Anyway, here are the songs:

(The "Next Girl" video is (in my mother's words) "pretty raunchy," so I'm posting the Ferguson appearance instead (I would recommend checking out the real music video though, it's quite groovy).


Okay, the George Michael video is also pretty risque (at least for the '80s), but what the heck. It's V.D. '11. Here's the real thing.